Geronimo Festival. A complete wash out - and not due to the Bank Holiday weather.

GERONIMO - NO - NO

The advertising got us – Glastonbury for kids. Now we have taken our kids to Glastonbury and a whale of a time was had by all so Geronimo was going to have some heights to reach.
One of our lovely contributors went on the Sunday with her husband and two kids, aged 3 and 6. They tell a tale that has by now been well documented on social media and on ITV and BBC news..

It’s fair to say that Harewood is not really suited for accessing big events. Its nigh on impossible to get there on a bus (especially on bank holidays), there are no rail links, there is one road from the A1 several miles away. The site itself has a one car at a time archway which again severely restricts the flow of traffic. There are several other access routes available although since filming of Emmerdale moved here these seem largely out of action.

So the queues that met our intrepid reporter could perhaps have been predicted, the disorganisation of the ticket issuing and associated queues could have and should have been arranged much much better. Its bad enough as adults but when you have excited little ones in two complete with buggies it’s a horrendous experience. Nobody seemed to know what was going on, where tickets could be collected from, what was happening with prepaid parking, the lack of knowledge from staff working Geronimo would be one that recurred through the weekend.

Entering the festival it seemed like things were spread out to create the effect of a bigger festival. Tents dotted randomly with no clue what was in them until you go right up to the entrance. No maps to help guide or plan were given nor available on the site, no main stage could be seen and this is where most headed as various luminaries from CBBC were to be found. Not that you could see anyone when you got there. A very low and small stage, a wide area in front of it meant that as an adult you were struggling, when everyone, of course, put their little ones on their shoulders, it was clear from the comments around us that even the kids couldn’t see. The simple answer to help this would have been a higher stage and video screens, why there were no screens is a mystery. I heard that the weather was to blame for the non-arrival of planned screens. Get better screens then as I have been at many a wind and rain lashed event, far worse than anything Geronimo experienced and always had screens that worked.

Not far from the stage was an area with a large carousel and a couple of other fairground rides, all were free and included which meant that, well everyone wanted a go. It was like the first few minutes of the Next sale every time the ride started to slow with kids almost dragged off the ride so adults could barge through and plonk their kids on the nearest thing. No point the kids saying “I want to be on the bus”, it’s the tractor for you my lad and be happy about it.

It was clear that there was not enough of any substance to entertain the kids, the huge main arena was randomly used and bore no relation to prior advertised timetables nor did the two or three tents they trudged over hill and dale to. Seeing the horrendous queues everywhere our reporters and family opted to leave and make the most of what remained of Bank Holiday Sunday. There simply was not enough on site for this amount of people. Very poorly planned.

By contrast (in some sense) we arrived on the Monday at around 10.00am, no queues, a handful of cars in the car park and a casual stroll up the ticket booth. 10 minutes after parking the car we were in and straight away got the same sense of a vast expanse with tents flung to its far corners. There was hardly anyone on site and so heeded advice and headed for the carousels where our son had several rides on whatever he wanted,  a fire engine, a police car, the bus.. the onto the train, again a couple of rides there…he had a look at the big carousel and didn’t fancy that (he is 2) shame because I really did!

There was something going on at the main stage and the few people on site seemed to be there. I could see my colleagues point completely, even with just a few rows of people it was difficult to see, such a small and low stage, apparently something was happening on the ground but we had no idea what.

By now the rain had come, and it did come. Any organiser should know that if it’s over the bank holiday there is at least 50% chance of rain and rain makes people want to get out of it if they can. So everyone headed for the tents, tents that were having some activity in or other – we agree that until you got to the tent and had trudged through the mud you had no idea what was happening inside. Invariably it was people huddled over cups of tea or trays of pale chips. The rain thankfully didn’t last that long but it added to the quagmire outside. It turned into quite a nice day and we opted for lunch.

Now a big part of any festival for us is the food, gone are the days of a dodgy burger van, street food and innovative caterers are what adds to the experience. On the website Geronimo promised a variety of interesting things to eat including good options for our son, the Fabulous Fish Finger company offering a kids meal box which ticked several boxes for us.

However 75% of the outlets advertised simply weren’t there, and had never been there. The remaining 25% that were, were the sno-slush type places that are barely worth a mention. Instead, it was the standard burger grill, the standard fish and chip van (very pale and soggy fish and pale hard chips, yay!) and two corn on the cob places. Not the cutting edge of modern festival cuisine. Why were these places advertised, even today after the vent they are still being advertised. That is false advertising, the catering was not of the same quality nor quantity as advertised and that’s wrong. We opted to give our son his back up lunch pack that we brought from home and we decided we would get some late lunch off site.

Although the rain had stopped, because it was lunch time people wanted seating and save for 6 picnic tables – yes just 6 – there was no seating outside. So everyone remained in tents and sat at tables where it was clear activities had been taking place earlier. The only other tent we found housed Tumble tots and we were keen to experience this as the only class that runs in our area does so at a time inconvenient to us. Joe, our son loved it and got to go around twice. As we looked in the tent next door, Joe noticed it was soft play (well soft play with a leaky roof), there was no stopping him, not even the woman who said he was a bit big (tall / old I assume) for this and if more smaller children came we would have to leave. Thanks for that, it was billed as the 3ft and under section, never expected my son to be profiled at the age of 2.

As we made our way towards the exit we noticed stalls packing up and going, at 12.30! I have no idea what they were as they were in the final throws but this added insult to injury and we decided to call it a day. A very poorly organised and planned festival. Little though as to what actually works for kids of ALL ages, little thought about how to lay festivals out safely, no thought of signage, direction and many caterers / features just not as advertised.

From the official website FAQ

• Are all activities free once you pay entrance for the main stage?YES YES YES. Main Stage - Full Circus - Theatre Tent - Live Music - Fairground Rides - Craft Tents - Donkey Rides - Face Painting - Parkour - SPI school & lots more.

Well No No No, all activities were not free graffiti tshirt, dress up photos, amongst others were chargeable items.

• What happens if it is raining?We want to ensure that you can enjoy the event come rain or shine and many of our activities will be under cover and in marquees.

Well yes except many of those activities couldn’t be carried out as people sheltered from the rain  / used the only existing tables and chair for dining.

This was not a cheap festival to attend with tickets £25.00 each (including children over 2) and mandatory parking. Did we get value for money, hell no we did not, did Joe enjoy it? Yes he did, but would he have enjoyed going to the local Jungle Jim and then to the Bank Holiday Fair? Yes he would and we wouldn't have spent £75 in doing so. We respectfully suggest that if this excuse for a kids festival should reappear next year you spend your money elsewhere.